Expecting & Expectations – Your baby is on its way…
Your belly is growing, the pram is on order and you have the cutest outfits bought already, maybe even a few too many! Not long to go now, people say, when are you due? Being pregnant is both a fantastic experience yet, although we might not always like to admit it, it is extremely anxiety provoking…but why?
Bringing new life into the world is a huge responsibility, and I think if we consider this for any amount of time, in any detail, it can feel very overwhelming. We all still have that young part of ourselves that gets scared, and worries about whether everything will be ok. We also have the parental side to us, who wants to ensure we take care of ourselves and those we are responsible for. However, we also have the ‘adult’ part of us, which is essential at times like these to keep us grounded and able to cope.
“We may not be able to prepare the future for our children, but we can at least prepare our children for the future.”
― Franklin D Roosevelt.
One of the biggest ways we can take care of ourselves as new mums, or dads, is to be aware that we have three ego states, Parent, Adult and Child. It is important to know how we can use these positively at such a stressful, life changing time in our lives. When the Child part of you feels overwhelmed and stressed, ensure you draw on the nurturing parent side of you to sooth yourself, as well as your new baby. The Adult ego state of functioning helps you remain grounded and really enables you to relieve some of the stresses on a more practical level.
Life is often unpredictable, and we can often go along with the idea of ‘that would never happen to me’, but actually when we are due to bring a precious life into the world, we can find ourselves thinking very differently, very quickly! This can lead to us getting very overwhelmed and unnecessarily worrying ‘too much’. There are lots of ways we can remove some of these fears and plan for our futures, so that we can use the time we would normally use worrying, to enjoy being with our children instead, creating wonderful memories.
According to an up to date survey posted in the Guardian, it costs £218,000 to raise a child in the UK. This equates to around £10,400 a year.
Looking at statistics like this, it is no wonder that our worries as a new parent can be endless. We can’t be expected to have all the answers and as parents we just do the best we can with what we have. If you do, understandably, have worries or any concerns, then it is important that you relieve some of your stresses by planning for your future. There are so many different aspects to being a new parent; planning financially, emotional support, lifestyle changes and this is just the beginning!
Don’t try and do everything yourself, ensure you get help and support, regardless of what this is in relation to, you can only do and think so much!
Please note facts and figures quoted are taken from articles written in 2012 and may no longer be correct.
"Please note that this blog post was provided by Healthy Minds and although based on real people, different names have been used, where requested, by those sharing their stories."